So Far Off Broadway

9:16PM

Why can't ppl just be nice, and not make mean comments about ppl when they are only 5 feet away and not only can read their lips to some degree, but can also straight up hear them!

In summation, you suck FM! Yes madame, you suck!

6:17AM

My friend Rachel made me go to the bishops thing. It was lame and I was poisoned with pine nuts and didn't take drugs fast enought and ended up with burning lips and throat right up to this moment.

I did figure out where my cutting board disappeared to, and I spent a retarded amount of money on a new laptop and a 32 gb touch..... so I am Thankful for that. Now that I sound all shallow I am really grateful for my job and my car and my friends and my family and my smelly dog, and my own cubical and for my freedom.

That freedom is a double edged sword, and it makes me sad a lot, like every day, but I am really trying to believe that it will work out, ad I failed most of this week to see it. Oh well, myabe next week.

6:09PM

SO as much as I love, and I do, getting left alone... I still feel really lonely being left here alone on a holiday.

Yeah... gonna stay in bed until I can go to work.

7:04PM

really sick of being a friendless social reject.

and i am thinking about making pop tarts for thanksgiving.

10:34PM

Brandi tried to remember the last time a boy said she looked pretty, and meant it. And she couldn't remember.

SO, she decided to speak about herself in the third person, like she is some of princess. Because frankly is had better think she is a princess because no one else ever will!

6:36PM - completely inaccurate

6:44PM

grumble...

so apparently i suck at life in totally new ways today.

and that means i'm done.

way for safety nets to get torn away....

9:33AM

I clearly have social leprocy. The only thing to do about it I suppose is exile myself like they used to do with lepers.

And frankly, at this point in time, that plan sounds like a good one.

6:02PM

I looked in the mirror this morning that sal my double chin reappearing. My immedate thought was- wow, your fat, you should go kill yourself. And as I went through the day I started to agree with myself.

Erin, no need to lecture, its okay to be a fattie, blah blah blah. I worked hard to drop that weight, but here it is again. Its like nothing I do ever works. Oh, and that never getting married again. Well, I bet the double chin that said hello this morning has something to do with that.

9:00PM

Yet another sappy hallmark holiday is coming saturday. Sweetest day.

My grandpa made me help him pick out a card for my gma. Lame. I haven't had a sweetest in so long i don't remember what it is like, and an not going to get a reminder anytime soon!

Can't even get a guy to ask me out on a date, let alone a sappy card.

I don't know why this is bugging me, i have been in a really good place lately, but it does bug me.

I blame all my friends who are getting married off in the next couple months! (jk :) )

9:19PM

FRUSTRATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So frustrated!

Forget it, I will just go to bed!

8:44PM

Dog training went relatively well. I am way behind at work... and I am getting nervous about that... I am less nervous about other things... well most things. I love my car, and my job, and my dog. And random time spent with random ppl. But, ultimately I am alone and its okay. Bridezilla's is on, and it amuses me that these ill tempered monsters can get a man but i sit at home on my butt unless I twist ppls arm's. Funny. Oh well, 50 bucks a check goes to the baby fund until the SL are paid off, and then everything goes into it. Worst case scenario, I will have enough by 41 y/o. I never thought I would have to resort to that, but if tahts what I have to do, then I will.

But, as I have 12.5 years to wait, I might as well not give up hope yet.

I figured out my halleween costume. To bad I can't spell it.
It sucks to know you are wrong and have no idea how to make it correct. Story of my life.

My feelings are still hurt about not being deep enought to take that class, but mostly bc she hasn't tried to apologize, not bc of her rude comment.

I might hit Ceder Point this weekend with Carrie... that would rock. I don't know her family very well but they seem nice.

I wish my family cared about ppls feelings like other ppls do. I will make sure to have that in mine, when I adopt my Russian Baby. I would rather adopt a chinese baby girl, but they require two parents marreid for at least blah many years... Russia is much easier.

I feel better about being alone, now that I have plans inplace to deal with it. Yeah... so things are much better, and leveling off, but not fantastic.

10:06PM

i am so tired, but i can't sleep until my download is over... sad.

and i am so behind in work reading, but what ya going to do.

i have been kicking around some stuff lately, mostly throwing myself in front of a train bc i can't move out, but hey... what you going to do.

but saying something might be as devistating.

lame!

8:23PM

ambigudate... that is my new favorite term. just so you all know. to bad it is the extent of my love life... or dating life, or whatever.

10:49PM

just because he has kicked the negaverse around from time to time doesn't mean that he is prince charming

7:15PM

So, I looked at some more apartments tonight. And found one that will be a little bit cheaper... but still... IDK!

So now I am going to sit down and work out the numbers. We shall see. Either way I have to get out off here.

10:30PM

best response to what happend tonight at the tute:

Ryan
she's a retard and she needs to shut up

. . .

but anything else and she needs a good smack in the face

12:48AM

i got two dances out of my crush tonight. 2. but i kinda realize that that will be all i ever get.

when i move i will be in the other ward, maybe that will help.

5:26PM

So work didn't suck.

6:19PM

The terror of being unemployed is passing, and the terror of being unable to do my job and getting fired has started up.

Meanwhile the terror of dying alone remains consant.